Our daughter started first grade this week. Last year, she learned to write. And there was a period there where that was super frustrating for her. She knew what she wanted to make her pencil do on the paper, but she didn’t have the skills to make it happen. Her older brother could write. The adults around her could write. But she would get so mad because she felt like she was doing it wrong.
That’s not exactly correct, of course. A part of the learning process is trying, even when you don’t have the skills. And now, she’s a writing machine. But it was touch-and-go there where she was very caught up in doing it the right way.
And it’s exactly the same way I see people get caught up with fitness and nutrition. And frankly, it’s the exact same way I was caught up with getting it right for a long time.
It’s what happens when people come to the gym on a deadlift day, even though their back is bothering them, because it’s Wednesday, and they have to come Monday, Wednesday, and Friday or it’s not right. It’s when they get sore from playing hours of impromptu pick-up basketball when their kids are in town, but still run 6 miles the next day because it’s Tuesday, which is their long run day, and that’s what’s on the schedule. It’s when it’s the last day of summer, but they already planned their macros, so when their kids ask for a family ice cream trip, they just have a plain seltzer instead.
And listen, there are a million reasons for the choices we make. And none of those choices I just laid out are inherently right or wrong. But we get caught up in thinking there’s ONLY ONE RIGHT WAY to do it. When in reality, if you are working on your fitness and working on your nutrition, you ARE doing it the right way. You can’t do it wrong.
If your plan calls for you to do a 5 mile run, but you’re sore, so instead you walk 2 miles, YOU WILL STILL GET FITTER. If you skip deadlift day and give your back an extra day to rest, you will go into the weekend MORE CAPABLE. If you go out for family ice cream on the last day of summer because it’s time for you to engage and build memories and strengthen relationships with your family, you will very likely add MORE TIME to your life because of the happiness and meaning than you would have with the 300-calorie restriction.
This is a journey. And it’s a long game. And the goal is to make mostly good choices forever. And as long as that’s what you’re working toward, you can’t do it wrong. Some things will work better than others. Some choices will backfire. Sometimes there will be better choices than the ones you end up making. There is trial and error and there are setbacks. You will find better ways to do it along the journey and you will let go of ways that you tried, but don’t serve you anymore. Coaches can help you sort through all of that.
But as long as you’re on the journey, don’t stress. Every workout counts. Every vegetable counts. Every gram of fiber or protein, every good night’s sleep, every quality afternoon with your family, all of that counts. All of that moves you closer to where you want to be. You’re doing it.